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Looper is set in the future of 2044. Only, for the characters, its the present. Am I confusing you already? HAHA.

Anyway, time-travel won’t be invented for another 30 years (that’s 2074), but it’s immediately outlawed when it does. And only the mafia uses it to dispose of their enemies.

You see, in the future, everyone is tagged with some nanotechnology alarm system, that will notify the police if someone is killed. So, they use the time machine to send their enemies back to 2044 to be killed by Loopers.

Loopers are assassins hired by the mob to do the killing, payment via silver bars strapped to their targets’ backs. Once they receive gold bars, however, it means they have “closed their loop”, essentially killing their future selves.

Young Joe (Joseph Gordon Levitt channeling Bruce Willis with furrowed brows and thick make-up) is a Looper. At designated times, he kills people sent from the future, collects silver bars, and lives the high life (literally, getting high at parties).

Then one day, a man appears, unhooded. Young Joe recognises the man as Old Joe (Bruce Willis), and in hesitation, allows the old man to escape. We already know what happens when Loopers don’t close their loop (nothing good comes out of it). Young Joe must track down old Joe in order to close his loop and collect his retirement paycheck. But old Joe has an agenda of his own.

Oh, also, in the future, telekinesis happens as a mutation in about 10% of the population (and this is important to the plot in the second half of the film).

As a time travel film, I think its pretty decent. I guess the overwhelming reviews sky-rocketed my expectations so much so that I kind of felt that while it was good, it still felt like I’d seen better.

For instance, TimeCrimes (or Los Cronocrímenes), a little spanish flick about time travel, was a much tighter and suspenseful film, delivering way bigger mindfucks all round.

Rating: 6/10

Just a thought – How plausible is it, that when time travel is invented, the mob uses it only to dispose of their enemies, and not to make money? Just think of how inconvenient it will be if just one of them escapes, and then decides to go after the mob when they’re just learning how to walk, or taking a piss in the toilet.

Taken was an action packed film about an enterprising man named Marco from Tropoja, whom, in a bid to provide for his rather large extended family, decided to go into the questionable trade of human trafficking, with his operations headquartered in Europe, specifically Paris.

Unfortunately, one of the merchandise had an overzealous father who happened to be a retired CIA operative with an uncanny sense of timing. Named Bryan, this father went on a murderous rampage of what seemed to be half the male population of the village of Tropoja to save his daughter.

Marco from Tropoja was one of the dead.

Taken 2 is the tale of Marco’s revenge by his father.

She still wouldn’t go out with me. What do I do now? Left knee?

But sometimes, things in life just doesn’t go your way, especially if you’re of a minority race in an American film.

Taken 2 is a by the numbers sequel to taken. More people kidnapped (The last time it was daughter Kim [Maggie Grace], this time it was his wife Lenore and Bryan himself!), more explosions, more car chases, and more dead bodies.

In other words, more of the same.

Rating: 5/10

I have to say though, that the Taken franchise has more realistic depictions of the last boss fight. Usually in movies or games where the protagonist fights his way to the last baddie, he’s often a bad-ass with a hulked out body and awesome Wing Chun skills.

But seriously, look at all the real life big bosses around us? Donald Trump, Warren Buffett, Mark Zuckerberg. Other than a shitload of money and being bosses, their only other commonality is their pasty skin and non-athleticism.

So kudos to Luc Besson (Producer and Writer) for giving us realistic and anti-climatic last-boss kills.

Also, given google image search returns for Taken 2, they may as well have named the movie “Taken 2: The One Where Liam Points His Gun Everyfuckingdirection Possible” 

Have you ever wondered if there was more to life, other than being really, really, ridiculously good looking while holding a revolver?
– Bryan Mills, America’s Next Top Violent Model